They Say the Best is Yet to Come

I have been asking myself over the course of the week why i wrote this blog. I wrote it to express what I had been feeling. But then again it was like getting to say everything that was left unsaid...Then I got down to the real reason...I just wanted to know that Shawn was okay. i do miss him as a person. We had been through so much that it is impossible to forget, there is no amount of alcohol, no amount of tears, or new memories that will replace it. And for this I am glad...I am glad that the memories live on forever. We both learned...about what love was and what it was not.
Out of the blue I get a text from Shawn saying that there is a song by Hinder that helped him get over me and that he thought it was funny. It is called, "The Best is Yet to Come." I have heard this song...the first verse reminds me of him too. But it is like we are at peace with what happened. It ended bad, but overall it happened. Him and I are texting back and forth and for the first time in a while I feel like we are having a conversation...We are content, we are not fighting, there is no lying, no drama. There is smiling from my end. I would not call the tears rolling down my face crying because I am not sad...I just miss us bullshitting and talking about nothing important. Maybe I am sad because I know that this conversation will die out soon and we might never talk again just like we will never see each other again...It is like for a moment he is apart of my life in the smallest way...it is through four word text...and I never thought they would mean so much. We are engaging in conversation...we are reminiscing, it will go no and means nothing but it is something, something I miss, because I miss him, I miss him a lot. I miss...

The part of the song that i think helped us both is:
Go for it
Run toward it
Dive in head first
Live life with no regret
Put your heart out there
Don't be scared you might get hurt
Its all worth it in the end
It'll all work out in the end
Because the best is yet to come

Mood: Blank, Happy
OMg there was this one time at the Platte and I was getting all of my stuff back. It was over this last break...I could not even look at him because I could not believe this was happening. All I could do was throw rocks at his shoe...All of a sudden the mood completely changed...well he was trying to through me in to the River...and I was screaming and we were wrestling and talking loudly to each other about how stupid we both were. Then finally we embraced...and that was all we needed at that moment. That day was in the past but I do remember it, i will always love that moment. We were not a couple, we were not anything...but whether we admit or not we are apart of each other. He has a piece of me, that even if he threw it away, a piece of me is still gone nonetheless. Having us talk is like having it back for a second. Not the relationship of fiance and exes but we had something that could not have a label...there are also no words...just feelings on my part...